


Post Blue

by i_m_disappeared



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Bisexual Male Character, Explicit Sexual Content, Gay Male Character, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Smut, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-18
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:47:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26518462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_m_disappeared/pseuds/i_m_disappeared
Summary: Remus planned to take on an evening of extra work to save some money for his college education. Remus did not plan to get seduced by a mysterious business man. Remus did definiteley not plan to let this man be more than a one night stand.Aka: the sugar-daddy-fantasy nobody ever asked for, starring the person least likely to ever become a sugar baby: Remus Lupin.Remus is a hipster student. Sirius has a leading position in his familiy's IT business. They coincidentally meet and immediately feel drawn to each other. They both don't look for anything but a short night of fun. They both get surprised.This is a muggle AU. They did not go to school togehter. They aren't even the same age. No magic. No TERFs!
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 22
Kudos: 57





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I am very new to this (this is literally my very first fic) so please bear with me! Before we get to business I need to make an abundance of disclaimers: 
> 
> A) I contemplated for quite some time if I even could post a Potter-fic in these times, regarding the vile atrocities the author of the series is constantly spewing. Sadly death of the author is not a concept I can entirely support, but nontheless for a very long time Harry Potter existed for me in (very queer, very trans inclusive) fandom spaces alone and I don't want to stop this (while obviously stopping to promote any of her work and to support her in any way) so I decided to post it. In this story, Lily is a trans woman (later on there might also appear a genderfluid character) and I am planning to include even more central trans characters and storylines in future works. Being a cis woman myself I still am aware I am full of bias, as careful and educated I try to be. So if something bothers you or is depicted incorrectly, please don't hesitate to call me out on it! I appreciate it!  
> It is safe to say that none of the author's hateful bullshit reflects in any way my views (nor do I believe the characters she once created would ever agree with her). Trans people are real and valid and amongst the most vulnerable groups in society so if you can, consider to donate to charities fighting for trans rights (examples could be: The Trevor Project, Mermaids, Trans Life Line, Trans Women Of Color Collective and many more). 
> 
> B) The whole premise of this story is a very sexual one (although it`s not exactly PWP... the porn is kinda the plot I guess...) so there will be very explicit smut scenes in this. If you don`t like to read this, please don't! Nontheless I will put a content warning in front of every chapter containing sexual scenes. I might also add additional warnings I am not aware of myself yet, as I progress. I sadly don't have this whole thing planned out yet (and it shows!)
> 
> C) As you probably can tell at this point, English is not my native language. I try my best but there will be mistakes. Lots of them. Sorry!
> 
> D) The title is taken from a Placebo-Song I extremely love. It does not really have anything to do with the story, it just gives me the vibes of these two. Just a fun fact. 
> 
> If you made it through that mess above: Congrats and thank you! If you still want to continue reading: thank you even more!!! Comments are highly appreciated and will result in eternal greatfulness! Enjoy!

It was a mild summer night and Remus was pretty grateful, that he got the shift at the bar on the outside. Inside the hotel, he would probably already have melted. It was practically impossible to breathe in the 40-degree hot lobby. It was almost unbearable to just pass it when he had to go to the storage room to get some bottles to refill, and he certainly wouldn’t want to switch places with the bartenders there, whose sweat was probably already starting to sweat and whose shirts were sticking to their bodies. On the other hand: that might help increasing the tips a lot. But he didn’t really have a problem with those tonight, so he gladly chose the fresh air over a few extra pounds.

It was already quite late – okay actually it was 11 p.m. but he started working at 4 – and he still had two hours to go until he could call it a day. But who was he to complain? He was just pitching in for his friend who got sick. He wasn’t doing this on a daily basis. That would’ve been extremely exhausting, but for just one day of work it was easy money and he could really use some extra bucks as he tried to make as much as possible during semester break so that he could focus on classes during the term.

And this wasn’t too bad of a work environment either. The event he worked at tonight was some kind of award thingie of an economy action group – neither awards nor the economy were topics, Remus was in any way interested in, so he didn’t bother to find out more – and took place at some huge hotel in the heart of the city. One of the severely fancy ones with crystalline chandeliers everywhere and a huge fountain in the middle of the patio.

That kind of hotel, where more or less normal people like himself wouldn’t even be let in. At least not as long as he looked like his usual self. But he didn’t tonight. Instead of severely ripped skinny jeans and some bandshirt or oversized jumper he was wearing one of the only pair of pants he owned, that had no holes in them, a plain white collared shirt and a slim black tie which he extremely detested. It felt like that thing was choking him, but not the good way.

He didn’t really feel that look, but he saw the approving expression on his father’s face when he left the house. Something so different to the usual way he’d react to his appearance and clothing of choice. He tried not to think too much about it to prevent getting a headache or gastric ulcer.

But to be fair, his father seemed to be not the only person to approve his upgraded appearance. It was not like Remus was a complete stranger to being ogled. It happened from time to time – although he wasn’t even close to aware how often it really happened, that some people literally turned their heads for him. Nonetheless there was a new turn to this: the kind of people looking.

He was used to more or less casual guys, and pretty but down-to-earth girls, maybe a little extra, or slightly affectedly edgy. People his age or a few years older, he would meet at bars or the occasional concert. This clientele probably did not visit bars, at least not _his_ kind of bars. He already had to turn down not only one or two not so subtle immoral proposals, but he managed to do it charmingly enough for it not to affect the tips, so that they were practically paying for getting rejected. However, these people were stinking rich and most likely didn’t come into money in a morally blameless way – if that was even possible- so his guilty conscience kept within reasonable limits.

As previously mentioned the stranger – that’s how he started to call him internally, when he recognized the ongoing glances about an hour ago – wasn’t the first one to stare. But he was the first one to do it another way, Remus couldn’t quite wrap his mind around. He couldn’t name why exactly it was different. The most obvious reason – and he was ashamed for even thinking it – was, that the mysterious man was ridiculously handsome.

Because Remus never wanted to be like that, he hated double standards. No matter how attractive the person was, being objectified, catcalled and treated like a piece of meat never was okay. But that was the point: he didn’t feel like that at all, not as with most of those other old crocks present, being inappropriate. Yes, the glances were intense and hardly given to misunderstanding. But they did not make him feel uncomfortable.

Fortunately, the other guests kept him busy enough, so that it wasn’t that hard to ignore the rather unwanted attention, at least for a while, when he constantly had to pour champagne into crystalline glasses or mix long drinks.

“What would you recommend?” It was odd. Although he couldn’t see the source of the question – he was standing with his back to the counter, polishing some champagne flutes – he immediately knew who was addressing him. Maybe it was the voice, a bit smoky yet extremely smooth, that was perfectly complementing that extraordinary appearance. Or it was the resonating undertone. It was clearly a question and at the same time it wasn’t. There was an undeniable presence in his words, and it was perfectly fitting the glances that were preceding all evening long.

Remus took his time to react, he didn’t hurry to turn around but made sure that the glass he was working on was perfectly clean, shining and put in its right place, before he gave himself to the stranger.

One – including Remus himself - could assume it was enough time to prepare for facing his counterpart. It wasn’t. He still was smitten by the charisma of this man, especially from a close-up perspective. It has been clear as daylight even from afar, that he was undeniably attractive. But only now Remus realized _how_ beautiful he was.

He practically radiated confidence, maybe one could even call it fierceness in a way. A way that perfectly matched his whole appearance. The unusually long, pitch black hair has been put into a not exactly messy, but also not totally sleek bun. Something you would maybe expect on a rockstar or artist or even athlete but definitely not on a presumably boring businessman.

Still it worked surprisingly well with the perfectly tailored black suit he was wearing. A suit that most likely cost as much as Remus made in a year in his side job in a bookstore.

His features where sharp, with a jawline and cheekbones you could’ve cut glass on, and still they appeared surprisingly delicate. The whole man was in a way a walking contradiction and still somehow fit into an oddly harmonious overall image.

What was up with that obscene number of rings on his fingers? Was this a store of value or just his obscure way to follow a fashion trend? Was he seriously wearing a bit of eyeliner around those mesmerizing stormy grey eyes or was the light playing tricks on Remus’ perception?

And why was all this in its strangeness still ridiculously hot? Remus wasn’t a liar and saying the stranger did not fascinate him would have been an exorbitance. But being true to himself did not mean he had to wear his heart on his sleeve. So understatement was the name of the game.

Just in time before it could’ve gotten awkward to not talk and just stare at his opposite, he remembered that he still had a question to answer and a job to do for that matter.

“I probably should just be a good employee and suggest the most expensive stuff we’ve got. But today’s your lucky day and I won’t prey on you. Gin and tonic is always a safe bet if you ask me, especially regarding they have pretty decent gin here.”

The chuckle he got as a response caught Remus a little off guard. It was kind of surprising that a man like that was even able to produce such a noise. But maybe it was time to leave stupid stereotypes, like what kind of people – if that concept even made sense at all – could sound which particular way, in the past. If anything, the slightly unfitting reaction was even more intriguing.

“Well I feel honoured to experience such kindness. Make two, then.”

Of course, Remus immediately guessed whom the second drink was for, but he did not want to show any weakness, so he just did as he was told instead of asking. Considering that he wasn’t really experienced in tending bar and did it only every now and again, his cocktails and long drinks were a bit of all right and he acted practiced enough to look the part. Therefore it didn’t take too long until two neatly prepared glasses – with cucumber and ice and all – were located on the counter and he proceeded to charge his now client a horrendous amount of cash, not keeping him from leaving a more than generous tip.

And as expected the second drink was being shoved in his direction. Remus shook his head to decline the offer, his slightly too long curls falling a bit deeper into his eyes so that he had to use one hand push them back.

“I don’t drink while working” he lied. In fact _when_ he did bartending jobs from time to time it was _explicitly_ to drink for free during it and afterwards and he had already tried some of the most expensive champagne with some of the other bartenders earlier that night.

The real reason why he didn’t want to accept the invitation was having to learn the hard way in the past, that it wasn’t advisable to spark some guys’ hopes, if you didn’t plan on compensating for the gift in a very special way. For some men buying someone a drink made them entitled to more than just a conversation and it was a big concern for Remus to show clearly that he wasn’t up to this kind of transaction.

This wasn’t the first time he rejected someone this way, but it definiteley was the first time he got this reaction: it was as if his thoughts had been read.

“You know it’s just a drink, nothing more, right?”

Remus couldn’t conceal the surprised expression on his face. And he also couldn’t help but search for the stranger’s eyes, only to find pure sincerity there, displayed open on that fascinating shade of swirling grey, that seemed to glow as if illuminated from deep within. It was impossible to take his own eyes off.

Just as before, there was a pause where no one spoke, the air seemingly filling with more electricity from second to second. It took a few more moments full of suspense before Remus realized once again it was his turn to speak. Fuck, this was definitely not working out the way he wanted it to.

“Thank you, but I’d rather stay true to my principles.” At least you couldn’t tell from his words what was going on in his brain, which was a big relief. “I am sure you find someone else who is eager to share it with you.”

He shoved the glass towards the other man, being halted by him not a second later. Fortunately – or was it purpose? – their hands did not touch, when he stopped the movement, but the other’s fingers situated closely above his own, not even half an inch away. Because after what those eyes did to him and the electrifying feeling radiating through his whole body from where his skin was only in proximity, he really didn’t want to test what would happen if he actually touched it. He did not trust himself and his so-called principles that much at the moment when he was completely honest to himself.

“What if I don’t want to find someone else?” He hallucinated, right? He did not really say that right to his face, that was impossible. But apparently, he did, and even further, he seemed to expect a reaction. And here was Remus, who secretly prided himself upon seldomly being at a loss for an answer or a witty remark, unable to do anything but staring at the man like a deer caught in headlights. Damn, this was far from his best performance and the smug grin on the other’s face made it clear that he wasn’t the only one noticing it.

Finally, it was somebody clearing their throat, that was ending the awkward moment and a look to the side showed, that it was one of the other guys, that wouldn’t leave him alone tonight. He fell just short of letting out a bugged sigh and thereby showing how little he felt like dealing with this person right now. On the other hand, he provided a chance to escape the rather awkward situation he found himself in, so probably he should be a bit more grateful.

“Sorry, duty calls” he apologized to mystery-man, who with a wave of his hand made it obvious that he didn’t mind but at the same time did not show the slightest inclination to abandon his post. Remus forced himself to take his mind off the irritating behavior and instead gave his attention to his new customer who seemed to be rather impatient.

“The usual please, honey.” It was definitely a challenge not to roll his eyes right into the back of his head. Or telling this fucker to not dare to ‘honey’ him again as well as asking how in the world he should remember what his bloody usual was, as he wasn’t that important.

Obviously, he did nothing of the above. As tempting as it was, it wasn’t worth it to risk a complaint and a possible restriction of payment if he only had to hang on and suffer through this for a bit more than one hour. Especially as it wasn’t his own job in the first place.

So instead of surrendering his impulses he shot the guy an indifferent smile and prepared the glass of champagne – he did in fact know what the usual was, but not due to the fact that he payed any special attention, but simply for serving it seven times before as well as it not being the most original choice of beverage in the first place – and processed to ask him to pay.

Which to his disapproval took longer than required and resulted in the other guy’s fingers touching his own way too long. It wasn’t even that he was unattractive. From an unbiased perspective he could’ve even been considered classically handsome. Strong physique, even more accentuated by the tailored suit he was sporting, sharp features and piercing blue eyes, well matching with the confidently worn and well-groomed grey hair.

It wasn’t his appearance that was putting the younger man off, it was his attitude, his arrogance. This guy wasn’t flirting with him, trying to charm and convince him he was worth his time and attention, but he was already sure he would get him. Well, he was extremely wrong.

“What are you doing after you finished your shift?” Was he kidding? No, the wolfish grin aimed at him proved that douchebag was totally sincere with this question, which was more of a suggestion. ‘

 _Anything that brings me as far away from you as possible’_ was the answer he wanted to give and honestly, he most likely wouldn’t have held back this time and risked unpleasant consequences just for a sassy remark.

But before he could open his mouth there was something – or rather someone – else changing the nature of the current setting: just as only few minutes earlier it was again a slight cough drawing his attention from one man to another. Although this time he knew exactly whom it was coming from.

It took quite some strength of will for Remus not to grin broadly but instead turn his head poker-facedly to search for this time’s interference factor. It did not take him by surprise that it was mystery-man casually pointing at the suddenly miraculously empty glass in his hand. As he wanted to jump at the opportunity and tell his unwelcome admirer that he needed to go he realized he wasn’t the only one who shifted the center of his attention.

The snot in front of him seemed to have sensed his competition and started what looked like a proper stare-off. Remus wasn’t sure if this was really happening and two grown men were fighting over his attention – which was absolutely ridiculous in the first place – or if it was the heat making him see things. Before he could find an answer to his question there was apparently somebody emerging the winner, as he was left alone with the stranger again. He didn’t really want to complain although this whole situation was extremely absurd.

Not hurrying too much he approached the way more interesting man again, not stopping before he could slightly lean against the bar directly opposite him. For a second, he considered thanking him for the rescue, but he decided against it, it was too eager. And he wasn’t sure whether he was entirely comfortable with being rescued or whether it bothered him. He prided himself on being capable of taking care of situations on his own. Being somehow forced into the role of the damsel in distress slightly rubbed him the wrong way. But he tried not to overthink it.

Instead he went for a different approach: “Did you honestly finish two glasses in that amount of time or did you water slash kill some poor plants with it?” The smug grin he got in return dazzled him insignificantly less than the first time it was aimed at him and secretly Remus asked himself if anybody could ever get used to looking at a face like his. He severely doubted it.

“If I’m really honest…” he took his right hand from under the counter where he held it and revealed the still full second glass and Remus couldn’t help but immediately start laughing gently when he saw it “… I managed to down one but two was a bit ambitious.”

The younger of the two men looked at his counterpart. This whole last half of an hour couldn’t be more surreal, only overtopped by how ridiculously good-looking this guy in front of him was. Seriously, was he human or was he an illegally attractive robot designed to bring young men into his subjection. An alien maybe, come to conquer earth. A wizard specialized in beauty spells. Or one of these genetically altered superheroes from the various movies whose mutations always seemed to make them incredibly beautiful on top of some sick powers.

Thinking about the looks of his opposite made him forget one more time that it was actually kind of common to talk to each other instead of just intensely staring but the moment he realized he should say something it was in fact the stranger who spoke first, apparently not willing to stay strangers for longer. “

What’s your name?” – “Does it matter?” Remus hoped his words came out nonchalant and indifferent instead of insecure or snappy. But he actually had gotten quite a pro in concealing his insecurities over the last couple of years, long forgotten the silent boy from school, too shy to speak up for himself. So why shouldn’t it work right now?

His opposite didn’t seem to mind either. “If you think it doesn’t, no.” In all honesty he didn’t even know himself why he had to pretend to be mysterious instead of just saying his bloody name. It wasn’t a big thing at all but something in this man’s way was so disarming that it created the urge to fight it inside of him, to make it not too easy. And that was surprisingly hard.

“I am Sirius” he added, and Remus needed all his willpower to catch himself and not blurt out what a strange name that was. He was a fine one to talk, named after an ancient dude killed by his brother.

“Remus.” He didn’t actively plan on letting his guards down but somehow it just happened. Sometimes he would introduce himself with a fake name, especially to guys he met while being out at night, but this option didn’t even occur to him when he told Sirius how he was called.

“So, Remus…” it was strange to hear him say it, almost as if he was trying out how it sounded, in which ways he could say it. And even though he met this guy just an hour ago, something in the manner he pronounced his name felt oddly familiar and comforting. “… what are you doing after you finished your shift?”

Again, he couldn’t hold back a laugh, whole-heartedly and genuine. The way he phrased the question, obviously and shamelessly mocking that douchebag from before was hilarious. This guy was definitely not as boring and stuffy as the location and occasion made him presume at first.

The offhand joke made Remus forget that he actually tried to be secretive and give away not too much about himself. “It’s probably not as interesting of an answer as all of you seem to expect, but in fact I can’t wait until I am allowed to get out of these uncomfortable clothes. And then I’ll probably just read or watch something and go to sleep. Nothing spectacular.”

He realized too late that talking about removing his clothes would serve as the perfect point of attack for a bad pick-up-line and he was very glad Sirius did not jump onto the opportunity. Although what he said afterwards wasn’t much better. Classier maybe, but not a bit less inappropriate.

“Any chance you would like to postpone your certainly very important plans…” – “…and?” He wouldn’t let him get away with this without having to say it out loud. “…and spend the rest of the evening with me. This parties are never really my taste so I am about to leave for my room, and I wouldn’t complain about having actually interesting company for once today.”

He wasn’t directly saying it but it was very clear what the real intention behind this offer was. Come to my room because you are good company? Sure. Remus might have been younger than his counterpart but that didn’t mean he wasn’t very well aware what special kind of company the other man was looking for.

“Okay, wait. Just to check if I am getting this right: did you just casually and practically out of nothing ask me to come to your room and have sex?” He couldn’t quite say where the heart to openly call him out had come from. Maybe it was the disappointment speaking, that this guy wasn’t at all different from the other men taking sexual attention for granted.

But he in fact was different and he was about to prove it. “I am sorry if you got the feeling, I was asking you for sexual favors alone, that wasn’t my intention. I enjoyed our brief encounter and would really like to get to know you a little. I think you’re interesting. And yes, I would lie if I denied I also think you are incredibly beautiful.”

He did not really say that did he? The redness flushing into his cheeks made clear the rest of his body had heard it too. Sirius was kind enough to ignore it, but he already was a step further, taking an expensive looking pen out of his jacket’s inner pocket to write some numbers down on one of the napkins displayed on the bar.

“This is my room, twelfth floor” he added a small twelve behind the numbers he had already written, in an exceptionally elegant handwriting. Then he put the pen away and met Remus’ gaze again. “I would be glad to see you later. I’ll be waiting. If you don’t come it is fine too. And if you want to go you can anytime. I really want to emphasize that you don’t agree to anything just by showing up. Okay?”

While handing the napkin over his fingers just very slightly brushed Remus’ palm and that small, practically non-existent touch alone was enough to send a burst of power surges through his whole body, resulting in his “Okay” being more a weak whisper than the bold response he wanted it to be.

“Well, see you later then. Hopefully” He gave him a last smile before he walked away, turning around at the entrance to witness that Remus couldn’t take his eyes off him the whole time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading!   
> Come and tell me what you think in the comments, I highly appreciate it :)


	2. Chapter 2

Something seemed to happen with time, after Sirius left. One moment, it felt like a minute took hours to pass, the next Remus realized half an hour had already been over. It was strange but that just matched the whole situation. However, it wasn’t nearly enough time to make up his mind how he wanted to decide so that he was as clueless as before when he finally was allowed to end his shift.

Even already in the staff dressing room, where he could thankfully peel off the tight, sweaty clothes and stuff them carelessly into his worn-out brown leather messenger bag, he didn’t manage to make a decision. After refreshing his deodorant he slipped into the clothes he brought and at least felt a lot more like himself after being able to change the uncomfortable shirt, tie and dress pants for some black skinny jeans with rips on the knees, an oversized, worn out, white Fleetwood Mac-Shirt he snatched at some vintage store and a pair of black Vans that had apparently seen a lot of better days.

He took a critical look at himself in the mirror on the opposite wall, putting the beanie he was wearing most of the time in its designated place to at least try to tame the mess of curls on his head and adjusting the delicate silver ring hugging his left nostril. He suddenly thought he looked very young. More like a teenager than the actual 24 years he was old.

It wasn’t unusual he got carded when going out to bars or clubs. For a moment he feared, that was exactly what Sirius was looking for: an underage boy to have his way with. It was a possibility. A risk, and not the only one for that matter. And even though Remus was in fact not an underage boy anymore, the thought was unpleasant.

Still, the curiosity was stronger. The excitement to find himself of all people in this undeniably scandalous situation outweighed all worries. That a man like Sirius, sophisticated and mysterious and sexy, was really interested in him. And that he genuinely considered accepting the attention.

He couldn’t decide this alone. After digging through his bag for a few moments, stumbling across the small silver container hiding the weed he originally planned on using tonight and refusing to indulge himself in a bit of stress relief, he finally found the slender black smartphone he had been looking for. He unlocked the device, ignored the few messages waiting for him and immediately called up the number of his best friend.

Only when he heard Lily’s drowsy voice mutter “I really hope it’s an emergency, babe. Otherwise I have no choice but rippin’ up your cute little ass” he realized how late it was and that she had already been asleep. “Oh my Fuck, shit I’m so sorry I didn’t think of the time, please go back to sleep, it’s really not that important “ – “Don’t be silly sweetie. Now I’m already up so I can as well grace you with my wisdom. What’s the matter?”

Remus couldn’t find the words to describe how much he loved this girl. He never could. “You are an actual Saint, Lils. What would I do without you, huh?’ – ‘I’m a sinner I’m a Saint’ she quoted that stupid song and managed to sound good singing it, even with her slumberous voice. ‘And we already both know you would die miserably without my help.” She was joking and didn’t even guess how right she really was. “Now spill, what’s up?” Remus sighed. What was the best way to introduce this juicy topic?

“You remember I was working for Pete tonight at that hotel party?” Affirmative mumble on the other end of the line. “Well, I kinda met someone.” – “Again? Will this be a regular conversation we’ll have every other week now?” Just as she said it he realized how ironic it was and couldn’t hold back a giggle. It really hadn’t been three full weeks that he had been in a very similar situation, calling Lily late at night to ask for advice because of some guy.

But this wasn’t even close to the same. Ian had been a friend for years, he had been close to him, intimate with him before. Remus had just been unsure if it was a good idea to go to bed with him when they had just met each other by coincidence after almost two years of no contact. Lily had advised him it was indeed a good idea and she had been very right. This case was entirely different though.

‘It’s not the same. I don’t know this guy. We just talked for some minutes and it was nice. Then he asked me to come to his room. And… I think he’s older.” Remus wasn’t the best at estimating age, but he assumed Sirius to be in his early thirties. “Damn, darling, what’s going on with your life right now?” Honestly, he’d asked himself the same question a few times already. Something surely changed a few months ago. Or he just stopped clinging to a clearly broken relationship, and he could’ve had all of this earlier. Who knew?

“Okay so some sexy older guy asked you to sleep with him, am I getting this right?” – “Basically, yes.” – “And do you want to sleep with him, too?” – “I uhm… I don’t really know. I mean yes, he is interesting and hot as hell and I honestly don’t understand why he asked me of all people” he heard her taking in air as if to disagree with this claim but did not give her time to actually speak up “but it’s so… weird. Going to a stranger’s hotel room to probably have sex. Am I doing these things now?” –

“Nonono, sweetie that wasn’t the question. I didn’t ask how society would judge you for it but what _you_ feel. Other people don’t matter, they will always find some bullshit they can run their mouths about. But it’s important how you think about it. Are you just flattered that he finds you attractive enough to make such an offer or do you too have sexual interest in him?”

Remus sighed almost silently and closed his eyes, desperately shoving the fear of getting slutshamed again, like it has already happened since he started to explore his sexuality more freely, to the side. Instead he tried to picture the man who brought him into this confusing situation. He thought of stormy, mischievously glowing eyes, promising all the things he could make him feel in just one glance. Of elegant features assembling a face that could be considered a work of art. Of well-formed arms closing around him and lifting him easily off the ground and onto a bed. Remus bit his lip at the undeniable tugging in his lower abdomen. Apparently, his loins were way more eager to decide this case than his brain was.

“I really hope you don’t disrespect me that much that you would dare to fantasize about banging him while I am still sacrificing my beauty sleep for you.” Oh Jesus, the girl knew him too well. So well that she probably heard the blood rush into his cheeks in response to her teasing. The slight chuckle seemed to prove him right. “Okay so we established you want to fuck him. That’s important knowledge.” – “I also want to fuck Uma Thurman and Idris Elba. That doesn’t mean anything.” – “But those two aren’t sitting in a hotel room, waiting for nothing but your fine ass, are they?” She had a point there.

“But you are right, wanting isn’t everything, the most important factor is your safety. How did you feel while talking to him? Anything that made you uncomfortable?” Remus tried to recall the conversation, to search for red flags but already knew the answer. Anytime he could’ve felt uncomfortable, Sirius seemed to immediately pick up on it and made things clear. And he seemed sincere about it. “Not really, no. But maybe I missed something.” – “Listen to your guts. It’s not a guarantee of course but most of the time a good point of orientation.”

Remus thought of Sirius assuring him he was at no point obliged to sleep with him no matter what was still about to happen. He didn’t need to do that. He could’ve said nothing. “Do you have condoms?” He rolled his eyes. “Of course I do.” Good. Use them please.” – “Thanks for the reminder, Mum. Maybe wanna tell me how to roll them on, too?” – “I am just concerned about your wellbeing, you brat.” – “And then you encourage me to have sex with a guy I know nothing about?” – “Having one night stands is one thing, unprotected sex another. But you are right we need some safety precautions.”

She paused for a few moments as if she was thinking. “We do it like this: you keep your phone as close to you as possible and I keep mine turned up. The moment something doesn’t feel right you call me, and I call help. You have two hours. If you don’t tell me that you are safe within this time, I call help too. And give me the hotel and room number.” –

“You don’t have to stay awake for this, Lily.” It was unfair to do this to her. To make her stay up so he could live a silly adventure. An adventure she realistically could most likely not experience herself, even if she wanted to. Even if she would easily find five guys wanting to take her home in a heartbeat, being one of the most beautiful people Remus could imagine. As a trans woman she was also obligated to be way more careful than he would ever have to be, just to live safely, she would take a much bigger risk than him in this situation, make herself way more vulnerable.

So wasn’t it unfair to ask this of her? Her voice shook him out of his self-induced guilt trip. “Bullshit! You know I help my friends to get laid whenever I can so just accept my services. And I have Netflix, so everything is fine.” – “Really?” – “No, I lied. Haha, good night. _Of course,_ really, dum dum.”

Remus sighed. The girl was crazy. But in fact, her backup plan made him feel a lot more at ease and comfortable with taking the risk. He closed his eyes for a short moment to ask himself if he really wanted this. The truth was he did. His body was very sure it was a good idea and his brain was calmed by the security net Lily wove for him.

“Okay. Okay, yeah, we’ll do it like this. I’ll immediately text you the details, then I’ll have a smoke and get back to you when I arrived at the room. Oh God am I really doing this?” - “You are young, hot and obviously horny as hell. Of course you are. But do nothing I wouldn’t do.” – “That isn’t the best advice.” “Asshole!” she laughed “but sadly true. Ok second try: don’t do anything you don’t want, just because he asks you to. Keep your phone and stuff close so you can run in case of emergency. And don’t hesitate to scream for help.” –

“I love you, you know that?” – “How couldn’t you, I am the best. And I love you too. Now go get fucked.” They both laughed at the bad pun, then said their goodbyes and hung up. Remus took a deep breath, realizing what he just decided to do. He sent Lily the room and hotel details, immediately getting a suggestive GIF in response.

Then he realized he maybe had to send another text. It was kind of ridiculous, being of age and definiteley not obliged to inform his parents about his whereabouts. But still living at home changed the situation and he knew for a fact his father slept better when he was informed where he was staying, so he threw the olive green flanel still waiting in the locker over his t-shirt, fished his pack of cigarettes out of his bag, took one out and put it behind his ear before leaving the dressing room to some backyard where he could finally smoke to calm his buzzing nerves and type a message.

_“Hey Dad, I met some people after work, I won’t come home yet. I will probably stay at Lily’s. See you tomorrow. Remus.”_

He didn’t have to wait long for a response: _“Ok”_ Remus tried not to imagine the disapproving look on his father’s face while he typed the two letters. He shouldn’t mind, but still he did. However, this was clearly not the moment to think about his father, so he pushed it off and instead turned to the ashtray and stubbed out the cigarette after taking one long last drag. He was really doing this, wasn’t he?

The way from the staff area to the elevators wasn’t long but it was enough to get stared at by several employees. He had been right with his estimation that his regular self wouldn’t work so well in this fancy environment. But he walked fast enough to reach the elevator before he could be addressed by someone, letting out a relieved breath as soon as the doors closed behind him.

The feeling of relaxation didn’t last too long though. In fact, it vanished the moment he realized that the 12th was nothing other than the top floor. The stunning view on the lights of London out of the glass façade of the elevator, getting smaller and smaller as he rushed upwards, made him forget his nerves for some moments. This was incredibly beautiful, and he almost forgot to exit the cage while staring down on his hometown from an unusual perspective.

Finally, he remembered why he was there and stepped a bit hesitantly into the atmospherically lit hallway. Apparently, every single part of this hotel was perfectly arranged. He needed a second to find the right direction in the unfamiliar environment but eventually succeeded to locate the right room, checking the golden number on the dark wooden door back with the one on the napkin in his hand.

Had his heart beaten fast before, now it was trying to win an Olympic race out of his chest and it felt like it was succeeding. Before he could forget their arrangement, he pulled out his phone and texted Lily a short _“About to knock. Wish me luck.”_

And while his brain still turned somersaults if he should really go through with this, he watched his own hand reaching out and knocking three short times on the heavy ebony door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah... I guess this is an awful amount of build-up, but I had too much fun writing these friendship dynamics.   
> Maybe we are getting somewhere the next chapter... who knows ;))) 
> 
> Thank you a lot for reading! Comments are highly appreciated


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter contains explicit sexual content

The time after the soft knocking sound faded away stretched into infinity. It did not take a second for Remus to contemplate turning away and aborting this whole mission. The problem was the corridor was long and provided not a single opportunity to hide, making it extremely embarrassing if the door was opened and he was caught in the act of bolting. 

But what if the door was never opened? If Sirius had changed his mind or found someone more interesting. If Remus had taken too long? Although not even half a minute passed until there were unquestionable sounds behind the door, it was enough time for Remus to heavily overthink everything. Fortunately, before he could begin to severely spiral, the door was opened and behind it the man appeared, who managed to turn his world upside down in the matter of only a few hours with nothing but some words and glances and unspoken promises. 

Remus had hoped Sirius would have lost some of the overwhelming effect he had had on him earlier. The reverse was true. There, in the doorframe directly in front of him stood the spitting image of an ancient god. Sirius had used the time of waiting to make himself more comfortable. His pitch-black hair was let out of the hair tie holding it together earlier and fell in soft waves around his shoulders, his dress pants had given way to flowier ones, presumably silk, he was barefoot and held a wineglass in one hand. 

All of these facts could have been very noteworthy, hadn’t Remus been completely distracted: Sirius had taken off his suit jacket and opened the buttons of the black shirt, revealing a chiseled chest, adorned by a bit of soft looking dark body hair as well as several inked lines that did not fail to spark Remus’ interest. He couldn’t identify the motive with too much of the shirt still in the way, but he was eager to change that. 

Too late he realized he was once again just staring instead of acting like a functioning human being. Although this time he wasn’t alone in it. Being in his Sirius-induced trance Remus realized only after some long moments of silence that the other man has seized the opportunity to take his body in as well. He felt his heavy gaze sweeping over him, lingering in one place or another and needed quite an amount of willpower to stop a shiver running through him. 

For just a second Remus contemplated if this was their personal horribly cliché romantic comedy moment where they just shared a look and then immediately jumped each other’s bones without exchanging a single word. But before he could act on an impulse and make a fool of himself, Sirius took a step to the side and motioned for him to come in. 

The interior of the room was not really a surprise. It fit the overall image of the hotel: very fancy, very expensive and not at all original. Design off the rack for stinking rich people. On the first glance he couldn’t detect anything hinting at Sirius’ personality, not even a suitcase. Everything was very clean and impersonal. Remus allowed himself plenty of time to look around, took a few steps to inspect the floor-to-ceiling windows on one side. The view was breathtaking and managed to occupy his thoughts enough to take off the edge for a short moment. 

“I'm glad you could make it. Would you like a glass of wine?” Remus looked over his shoulder to where Sirius was standing by the high breakfast bar, almost as if he wanted to make a point of giving him enough space. In fact, a bit of wine to ease his nerves sounded like heaven. On the other hand, it could have been wiser to keep all his senses together right now. Apparently, his discussion with himself wasn’t left unrecognized: “I also have water, if you’d prefer that. Or I could make coffee…” – “Wine is fine.” 

He kept his eyes on Sirius opening a sturdy looking bottle and pouring dark red liquid into a glass while strolling back through the room to meet him. He made an effort to not touch Sirius’ hand while taking the glass from him, leant back against the counter and took a testing sip. As if he had any clue what qualified wine as good. He could tell if the stuff tasted all right, that was about it. This seemed to be a fairly good bottle. It tasted good, almost a bit too good, making it – in combination with his nervousness – a difficult task to not down it in one swig. Which wouldn’t have been too classy. 

This was weird, wasn’t it? Them together in this room, not talking, staring at their respective wineglasses. Was this a mistake? Should he leave before he could do anything stupid? As if on cue Sirius deemed it necessary to fill the silence: “Are you doing this regularly?”

Remus lifted his gaze to look at him. “This? What do you mean? Going to strangers’ hotel suites?” – “Actually, I meant working at this kind of events.” Remus shrugged and tried to answer indifferently. “From time to time.” He didn’t want to give away too much. Why would his new acquaintance need to know that he in fact never did this before and just helped a friend out. “And the other thing?” 

Now he couldn’t hold back a smirk. “Uh uh. You missed your chance.” Gosh, he was putting on quite a show and acted way more mysterious than he really was, but it was fun, and all of this was a big mystery anyway, so why not living it to its fullest?   
“Well, how negligent of me!” Remus chuckled and managed to hold his gaze without losing his train of thought or tripping up: “Yeah, how will you continue living without that important information. Isn’t it enough for you to know that I am here right now?” Wow, not bad. He was really finding his role and felt a little proud of himself. 

“Touché.” The way he pronounced the word reminded Remus of an observation that had occurred to him a few times already in the course of the evening: Something in Sirius' speech had been hinting at him speaking another language than English regularly. It was not a proper accent, just tiny derivations in pronouncing one word or another and a slightly different speech melody. He couldn’t pin it to a specific country until now but hearing that word in that unmistakable pronunciation made it suddenly obvious.

“Are you from France?” He kind of blurted out, forgetting that Sirius did not follow his train of thought so that the sudden change in topic might have seemed random for him. “Is it that blatant?” He interpreted this as a Yes. Willing to be the most vague version of himself in this situation, Remus did not expect that his conversational partner did not follow the same route and readily gave him more information – information he was secretly very interested in but would never admit – even without being asked. 

“I have been living in Paris for some years now so French is the language I use on a daily basis. Although I have been born in London and lived here the first few years of my life as well as spending all my schooldays in England, so I sort of hoped to assimilate better. What a shame.” That explained the British accent that was way too accurate for a French person. 

“No, it’s not bad at all” Remus admitted. It was quite the opposite from bad, honestly. “I am just observant sometimes…” He hesitated a brief moment, then threw his overcaution to the wind. If he could lay it on thick with the mystery, he could also up the flirtation. When if not now. “…especially when I am interested in something.” Sirius glance was so intense, it burned right through Remus’ affectedly unaffected demeanour, making him get all hot and bothered on the inside. And he wasn’t even touching him for fuck’s sake. 

“I see. Observant but unwilling to give anything away about himself.” Ouch! That hit a bit too close to home for someone knowing him for one hour at best. “Have you asked me to come here to call me out on my bullshit?” He couldn’t bite back the sassy response, but also wasn’t able to hide his grin that showed he wasn’t really pissed. He suspected he could never really be pissed at Sirius when he looked at him like that. He truly was a major idiot.

“Not at all, no.” The way he said it was deep and sultry and – has his body been this close all along? Remus raised his glass to his mouth and took a sip of wine, trying to stall, to calm down a bit. He could indulge in the sensual tone and ask what he was invited for instead. Or… “So, what you do you want to know?” He could just go on making meaningless small talk. Great job, Lupin. 

“How about we start with the basics. Tell me whatever you want. Age, occupation, interests.” Remus contemplated his answer for a second, then shrugged. “I am studying. Literature. That’s also boringly my main interest. I also like music a lot. Oh, and I’m 24.” He couldn’t resist to look Sirius in the eyes and ask provocatively: “Is that a problem?” The confusion on his counterpart’s face was immediately evident and seemed very honest. Which was a relief. “Why should it be?”

Remus tried to change the topic with a “Nevermind.” For a second it looked like Sirius would insist on questioning some more, but he seemingly changed his mind and chose a different approach: “So, if literature is your thing – what are you currently reading?” This guy was unbelievable. His attempt to show interest in him as a person was admittedly cute, but he was still so close and his skin was radiating heat, his breath was almost grazing his skin and some parts of Remus were starting to get impatient. As much as he usually enjoyed rambling about the underlying themes of sexuality and gender in Virginia Woolf’s work, there was a time and place for everything, and this was not it. 

“Do you really want to talk about my eighth reread of ‘Orlando’ right now?” He somehow managed to sound teasing. “If that is what you want, I’d be glad.” It was sweet and in an odd way comforting to know that Sirius was standing by his words from earlier, not making him do anything he didn’t want to. Although, Remus’ problem was quite the opposite at the moment, with the proximity of Sirius’ skin, his warmth and his indescribable scent all engulfing him. His voice had gotten hoarse without him noticing; “That’s not what I want.” 

For a brief second, he feared he would have to ask for it more specifically. But apparently, Sirius’ patience was growing thinner, too. 

“May I kiss you?” Remus didn’t answer. Instead he leaned towards the man until their lips finally met, hoping it sufficed as his confirmation of consent. And the second he felt these surprisingly soft lips under his own he stopped thinking completely and began to rely on nothing but his instincts. All his previous doubts and struggles vanished into thin air. Their lips and teeth clashed a few times, making Sirius chuckle due to the younger man’s over-eagerness before he completely took the lead. 

Remus had never been kissed like that before and he had kissed his fair share of people. Usually he wasn’t eager to let go completely, to give control to another person. He’d fight to the bitter end to stay in charge, to hold the reins. But Sirius took over so easily, his whole presence so captivating, Remus wouldn’t even remember how to regain control, if he could think of it right now. 

His bag went to the ground with a thump, he faintly recognized Sirius winding the wineglass from his fingers and positioning both of them out of danger, which was a wise decision regarding Remus did completely forget he was even holding it. He opened his lips willingly for the other man, marveling at the confident slide of his tongue against his own, at his glorious taste taking over each and every one of his senses. 

Remus hands started moving of their own volition, placing themselves on Sirius’ chest where his bare skin was exposed, starting to explore planes of soft skin dusted in equally soft hair, tracing firm muscles underneath. It did not take him long to slip off the shirt from his shoulders, that was poorly covering him to begin with. Soon followed by his own shirt and T-shirt being removed over his head. 

The forced short distance gave both of them the opportunity to take the other in. Remus normally wasn’t too confident being naked, at least at first. He did not exactly have a problem with this body, but he was told often enough that he was on the skinnier, less muscular side, to think about it when he was undressing with a new partner. The gaze with which Sirius was examining his frame was positively burning him up on the spot and leaving no space for self-consciousness. 

He felt his eyes grazing over his torso, lingering first on the floral tattoo wrapping his forearm to the tarot card further up and the moon phases above his right elbow, halting eventually on the little silver stud running through his left nipple, that embarrassingly immediately started to grow hard under the minimum of attention. 

The second he wanted to reciprocate and take his turn to size up his partner, Sirius closed the distance between them again by crowding Remus against the counter with his body and starting another heated kiss that made him forget everything he was thinking about. His hands autonomously wandered into Sirius hair, enjoying how the soft locks felt under his fingertips. Their chests were sliding up against each other, their tongues moving ravenously. 

Remus didn’t even realize soft sounds were escaping his lips, muffled by Sirius’ eager mouth. He was too far gone to care. He didn’t want to stop the kissing. He in fact never wanted to stop kissing ever again. But apparently, Sirius had a different plan, when he ended their kiss just moments later. Remus had no time to complain as the next second those alluring lips were attacking his neck, moving further down leaving trails of kisses and soft licks behind, making him reflexively clasp his hands around the counter’s edge.

Sirius didn’t stop until he reached Remus’ pierced nipple, looking up to him through dark lashes, providing the most sinful sight imaginable. “That’s so fucking hot.” Remus had no time to react to that statement, had he known how, when the next thing he felt was Sirius’ tongue toying with the piece of jewelry before sucking it into his mouth completely while rubbing the other one lazily between his fingers. 

Remus couldn’t hold back a shaky moan escaping his lips, leaning back to support his weight better, his hand still buried in Sirius’ dark curls. His nipples turned rock hard in an instant. They were definitely not the only part on his body and the way Sirius was pressed against him it was impossible he didn’t notice. He took his sweet time giving his best attention to his chest and when he seemingly tortured Remus enough, moved lower very slowly, dragging this devilish tongue over square centimetre after square centimetre of sensitive skin. 

He made a stop at Remus’ waistband, dragging his tongue slowly along the line, just above the fabric, making Remus squirm and concentrate very hard to not push his hips forward into the touch. He was so lost in the sensations that he realized to late what Sirius was planning. He straightened up, took him by the ass and lifted him onto the counter as if he was weighing nothing. Remus was so surprised, he let out a high, quite embarrassing sounding squeal. “Sorry,” Sirius mumbled, not even trying to hide his grin, before occupying his lips again in the best way possible. 

Without Remus' assistance his legs opened automatically, making enough space for Sirius to make himself comfortable between them. Before he could go a step further and sling them around his hips to lock him in place, Sirius took up his previous path down Remus' body once again, this time not being stopped by his jeans. He allowed himself time, grazing his hands slowly over his clothed thighs, teasing the bare skin revealed by the rips on his knees, letting one finger wander over the sensitive skin of his inner thigs, making Remus squirm even with the thick fabric reducing most of the sensation.

Then he finally opened button and zipper with nimble fingers and with a bit of help from Remus, lifting himself up from the surface, removed the tight pants from his legs, together with shoes and socks. In any other situation, Remus would have probably felt awkward, sitting on a kitchen counter in an unfamiliar environment, wearing nothing but his boxer briefs. But he couldn’t care less, since right this second Sirius sunk on his knees between his legs, a sight for the gods he couldn’t take his eyes off. 

Sirius apparently enjoyed his new position a lot, grazing his eyes appreciatively over Remus barely clothed body, stopping right where the shape of his erection was unmistakable under the thin fabric of his underwear. Seeing the raw hunger in his eyes was tantalizing, making him grow even harder, just from being watched like that. 

Instead of finally giving him the contact he craved so desperately, Sirius moved each of his hands to his thigs, grasping them gently, using exactly the right amount of pressure. His gaze wandering to the considerable wolf tattoo on his upper left leg, letting his hands follow. As he slowly let his fingers stroke the skin, he must have unmistakably felt the lumpy scar tissue covered by it, but Remus wasn’t mad at all he did not mention it. He wasn’t really eager to discuss this topic right now, not when he was almost completely naked and about to be taken apart by the most gorgeous man he had seen in years. Probably in forever. 

It seemed to be a pattern for Sirius to take his time, letting his hands wander slowly over Remus’ exposed skin, tracing the shape of his legs from the top down to the ankles and up again, teasingly circling his knees. Remus was so riled up at that point, he almost whimpered when Sirius’ fingers started caressing his inner thigs, too close but still agonizingly far away from where they belonged. They followed the hemline of his boxer briefs to the place where his thigh met his pelvis, making Remus shiver with anticipation. 

And then finally his fingertips were there, just skimming the distinct shape of his hard cock, making it twitch upon touch and Remus rutting up against his hand, demanding more. Thankfully Sirius seemed to be done teasing for that moment because otherwise Remus probably would’ve started screaming frustratedly. 

When finally the last little piece of clothing was removed from Remus’ body, making his dick rest freely and heavily against his stomach, he let out a relieved sigh, immediately transforming into a startled moan when Sirius repeated his earlier motion, this time with no bothering piece of cloth dulling the contact. Electricity shot through Remus whole body and Sirius was only moving his fingers lightly along his length to his tip. He was caught between begging for more and asking for a break. 

Just as Sirius began to lean forward, Remus realized there was still a very important issue, they hadn’t discussed yet. And he was a bit impressed he could still think of it while also being totally gone from just a bit of touching. “Wait!” Just as before Sirius reacted in an instant, looking up at him searching for any discomfort. “Outer pocket of my bag.” Because forming full sentences was too much to ask for, apparently.

Seconds later Sirius came back with the only thing he could've retrieved from that part of the bag: a condom. Remus couldn’t completely read the look on his face and a brief moment he feared he would have to argue with him about them using it, even just for oral. Which would have killed some of the mood, because safer sex, especially concerning one-night stands, was not a thing he was willing to discuss. Thankfully, he did not have to. Sirius just opened the wrapper with his teeth – poser – and expertly rolled it over his aching length, leaning down to finally take him into his mouth. 

From then on Remus’ brain became very fuzzy very quickly. He wished he could’ve remembered every single move of that heavenly togue, those plump lips. But it was impossible, swirls of his tongue around his swollen head melting into long drags into soft suckling. It was clear as daylight that Sirius knew exactly what he was doing, the warmth and wetness of his mouth the most divine thing Remus ever had the pleasure to witness. He didn’t recognize his hand digging into Sirius’ hair again, this time more roughly, desperately. Neither of them minded. 

His vocabulary was reduced to alternating between. “Oh my god” and “fucking hell” and “More”. And Sirius gave him more and more, taking him deeper, amplifying the suction until it was almost. Too. Much. And then, from one second to the other he pushed him over the delicate edge he had kept him on for the last minutes. Hours? Decades? Time was a very volatile concept. 

He felt the firm press of fingers right into that hidden spot behind his balls, unable to process what was happening when Sirius took him into his throat completely. And then he just saw stars. He neither realized he dug his fingers a bit too urgently into the scalp under them nor the obscene, unintelligible moans escaping him. Sirius did not let go of him before he was totally spent. 

When he came back into his body he faintly realized Sirius had already taken care of the used condom, so he was glad to just let himself fall back onto the counter, losing all the tension in his body. He heard Sirius chuckle from somewhere further into the room, but he couldn’t care for his dignity right now. Not after that orgasm he just had. 

“You were amazing.” Sirius suddenly touched his skin again. It was ust his calf, but it was enough to make his whole oversensitive body shudder. “Said the guy who just sucked my brains out.” He couldn’t muster up the strength to lift his head so he basically talked to the ceiling but judging after Sirius’ pleased low laughter it had been enough to bring his point across. 

Sirius appeared in his field of vision again, propping himself up next to Remus’ head. “You’re welcome.” He didn’t condescend to give an answer to that but he also couldn’t fully suppress a lopsided grin. Just as his eyes started to flutter shut, Sirius spoke up again: “Is that comfortable?” – “Not at all.” They both laughed and just a second later he was picked up and hauled into welcoming arms. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He did not get an answer as Sirius began to move towards the luxurious, very inviting looking bed they both neglected so far. 

He should’ve hated this. He did not like being carried a bit, but somehow he didn’t really mind, just slung his legs around Sirius’ hips and his arms around his neck. He would’ve expected his body being weary of more touch after the previous events. Instead, he was readily seeking it, not waiting a second longer to make their lips meet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo... it kinda happened I guess? Or let's say.. it started.   
> I originally planned to post all the initial smut in one chapter but then they kept talking and talking and I couldn't make them shut up and it was getting so long and yeah... I split it.   
> This is obviously far from over... I hope that's okay, haha. 
> 
> Thank you for reading as always! It means a lot to me!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter contains explicit sexual content. 
> 
> Hello again and welcome to roughly 4.5k words of pure smut it took me literally a month to write. I hope that's somewhat okay. 
> 
> Also pardon my French, like literally. It's been almost 10 years since I could consider myself somehow conversational. I tried not to do too much to not provoke an abundance of mistakes but if you find them please inform me, if you like.   
> You'll find translations in the end notes of this chapter. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this :)

All the sensations Remus was experiencing were on the brink of overwhelming him. The firm pressure of Sirius’ muscular arms around him. The delicious slide of the silky material of the pants he was still wearing against his tender bare skin. The soft vibration of his steps, that tongue sliding so confidently against his. The infatuating taste and scent. 

They reached the bed and for a second he expected to be thrown onto the mattress – he wouldn’t really have complained – but Sirius set him down very gently, making his body rest on soft, elegantly feeling sheets and plush pillows. Just as the other man attempted to climb into bed after him, Remus raised his hand, sending him a signal to stop. Sirius, as responsive and attuned to his reactions as ever, halted immediately. A smirk curled up the corner of Remus’ lips. He managed to sound more assertive than he expected himself to: “Strip.” 

This was just for fairness reasons. Remus was lying there, completely splayed out and exposed and Sirius was still majorly covered by those pants, although they were hanging rather low on his hips. That wouldn’t do! Sirius followed the order readily, pushing his thumbs past his waistband, pulling the fabric down continuously, until it was pooled by his ankles and he could step out of it. Remus followed the movement hungrily with his eyes, taking in planes and planes of light, smooth looking skin spread over strong thighs and shapely calves back up to – he swallowed audibly. 

The tight boxer briefs, the only piece of clothing still covering that masterpiece of a body, were not doing a good job at all. He could see every shape under the fabric. A fabric displaying an unmistakably dark wet spot. He had to make an active effort to suppress a groan, to not surge forward and pull that man on top of him without further ado. Being shown so blatantly that Sirius wasn’t unbothered by their activities, seeing him aroused and turned on so much made his head spin. 

The spinning threatened to cause him whiplash as that last piece of clothing went down too. He had considered Sirius’ appearance perfect before and seeing him finally naked wasn’t changing that opinion. The man’s perfection did not miraculously stop at the waistline. How could a person look like that? How could any tiny – or not so tiny – part on his body be exactly the right shape. Remus couldn’t take his eyes off even if he tried. Couldn’t decide where to look first. 

He took in broad shoulders and finally seized the opportunity to really look at the ink on Sirius’ skin, had it been mostly buried under cloth at first and Remus’ brain later been distracted by what had been arguably one of the best blow jobs of his life. The dark bold lines started on his left pec and went over his shoulder down to the middle of his forearm, leaving not a bit of skin uncovered.

Remus was not an expert in the art of tattooing but the bit of knowledge he achieved due to personal interest was enough to identify the style as traditionally Japanese. It was breathtakingly beautiful, almost overwhelming, lots of black and dark red and some lighter, golden looking spots. It was too much at once to recognize all the motives but there where floral patterns and swirls and two bigger ones looking like a hellhound and a lion that seemed to wrap around the shoulder, awakening the interest to explore if there was going on more on his back. 

Hadn’t there been so many other things to catch his interest. Remus eyes roamed on, from the immaculate art further down over abs, carved from stone. Hadn’t he touched Sirius warm skin, felt his heartbeat, when he was pressed up against him and experienced his wet, welcoming mouth, he could’ve sworn there was a marble statue standing in the middle of this hotel room. It would’ve fit with the décor. He let his gaze travel even further, over sharp hipbones, finally reaching the aim. He would never admit it later, not even to himself, but seeing his cock, hard and swollen red and of very notable size, made his mouth water.

“Fuck!” The word just slipped him, with no intention to utter it. Sirius’ lips moved to form a devilish smirk. One he should need a license for, to guarantee public safety. “That’s the plan, baby” Remus couldn’t believe his ears. He did not honestly make that joke, did he? And even worse: Remus’ body did not really immediately react to the term of endearment? This was unacceptable. Just as it was to let terrible puns slide without judgment. 

“Are you fuckin’ serious?” The smirk turned into a full-on grin. Bright and toothy and absolutely stunning. Remus was distracted. Realized too late the mistake he made and didn’t know his partner well enough to expect him to seize any opportunity for a shitty joke. Even in a situation like this. “No, but you are about to.” Remus just stared at him. He. Did. Not. The pleased expression on the other man’s face proved him wrong. He did. And he was proud of it. Remus started shaking his head and grabbed the closest sheet to cover himself. “Nope. No, this is so never going to happen. You can thank yourself, you ruined it.”

He wasn’t betraying his principles just because he was getting hornier by the second. He turned his back to this unbelievable idiot so that he did not see him but had to rely on his other senses to perceive what was going on. First there was just Sirius’ shameless laughter, indicating he was delighting in his agony. Then he felt the mattress dipping down, the other’s body next to his, his sinful lips grazing softly over his shoulder. “I am sorry, chéri. Pardonne-moi, s’il te plait.”

Remus shivered and couldn’t believe himself. A bit of French and some kisses and he was giving up? “Comment puis-je me rattraper?” This was so unfair. This whole man was a drug and now he was speaking fucking French. Remus did not understand a single word, apart from the pet name he recognized as such, but his body reacted to the soft sounds, especially spoken in that alluring voice. Accompanied by featherlight kisses trailing over his shoulder and a gentle hand caressing his side. He should be more strong-willed, but he had been weak for this man from the first second. It was a problem.

He turned around abruptly, so that he was automatically lying in Sirius’ arms, who just tightened his embrace instinctively, pressed him close to his chest. “You are disgusting. And I really hate you.” He at least had to make his reluctance abundant. “But I also really need to touch you.” That last sentence was more of a hoarse whisper. 

He let his fingers trace strong muscle, pronounced bones, further and further down until he could wrap them around his object of desire. Sirius’ dick felt amazing in his hand, the perfect weight, hot and hard, covered in delicate skin. He gave it a few experimental tugs, watching Sirius’ face. Seeing the guy who had turned him into a babbling mess shortly before so thoroughly blissed out, eyes closed, long lashes fluttering excitedly, as soon as Remus found out, how he liked to be touched, made a strange rush of power shoot through him. 

He took his time, trying different rhythms and strokes, swirling his thumb teasingly over the obscenely leaking tip, using the fluid for better gliding, coaxing soft moans out of him. One of Sirius’ hands was tightly gripping his shoulder, somehow keeping him anchored, preventing him from totally losing himself in the pleasure he was causing his partner. The other wandered to his hair again, shaky fingers grazing over the close-cropped parts of his undercut before digging into unruly curls, pulling him in for another searing kiss. 

It was all lips and tongues and teeth, sloppy and animalistic and still not close enough. Remus slotted their bodies together, his leg between Sirius’, a first shallow roll of his hips to finally make their dicks meet. Their respective groans were mostly swallowed by the other’s mouth. Having Sirius just in his hand had been exhilarating already, but feeling him like this, pressing against his own already half hard cock, was otherworldly. Overwhelming. He was starting to lose himself in the sensations, pretty sure he could get off just like this in no time. But Sirius seemingly had different ideas. 

“What do you want, baby?” There it was again: Baby. Remus had never been particularly fond of pet names. He never really used it for past partners, not even serious relationships, except the other person explicitly wanted him to. He never cared for being called anything but his name. But when Sirius called him baby it tugged at his insides the most blissful way, making him want to hear it again and again and again. 

Remus himself was a bit surprised by the immediacy of his response to the question posed. “I need you inside me.” 

It was not like he never bottomed before. He did. He enjoyed it. But he usually took his time to get to this point. To get comfortable enough with his partner to even want it. It was never a first-time thing. But right now, his body was very clear what it wanted. And that was to feel Sirius’ cock in him. 

What he got in response was a murmured “God, yes, please” and another mind-blowingly hot kiss. Soft palms travelling all over his body, making him shiver and ache for more. It was too much and not enough at the same time. When suddenly he lost the contact of the other body completely, he was about to protest. But the next instant he was back, his body on top of him where it belonged and Remus realized where he had been: getting lube and a condom from the nightstand, that was now placed within reach in the sheets next to them. 

Not having to worry about this aspect anymore was very welcome, as Remus’ brain could not focus on anything but Sirius’ soft palms travelling over his legs. He didn’t even manage to keep his eyes open. Tender strokes on his calves. A gentle massage of his thigs. Fingertips sliding towards the inside. He only heard the cap of the bottle clicking open, but the subtle sound made his whole body shiver, knowing what it meant. 

He was incredibly exposed. Legs spread open readily, on full display for Sirius to see and take apart. He couldn’t care less right now. “Tell me if something feels wrong or if you want to stop. Okay?” – “Okay.” It got out as only a whisper. Remus was ninety percent sure, he would not want to stop, but having the reassurance that there was always the option felt calming. Which was the absolute opposite to all the other sensations he was experiencing at this moment. 

Stopping was so far from his current desires. He rather wanted Sirius to finally start touching him where he needed it. Not just rubbing over his thigs or kneading his cheeks. He wanted more. And he almost let out a whimper when he finally, finally got it. When he felt a slick finger slowly approaching, circling his awaiting entrance, and then sliding into him with practically no resistance. 

Remus could neither supress the moan escaping his lips nor his hips from shifting forward, demanding more. Deeper. Sirius finger was long and slender and felt amazing, moving slowly in and out of him. But it was only enough for a short time. “Another.” He hoped it did not sound as begging as it felt inside his head. Sirius complied quickly and Remus happily welcomed the stretching feeling.

Unsurprisingly, Sirius was good at this. Wickedly good. Remus had needed literal ages to get to know his own body, to find out what really got him going and made the experience enjoyable. And here was this man who knew him for a few hours, and he figured out exactly the right spots in mere minutes. It was infuriating. But it also felt so good when he crooked his fingers just the right way and brushed over his prostate just a bit. He was too far gone in his pleasure to communicate, but apparently the noises he was making and the way he was arching his back was enough confirmation for Sirius to do it again and again.

Remus tried to look at him, to hold his gaze. But it got too intense way too quickly. He was burning up under his eyes, so full of lust and desire. Instead he threw his head back into the pillows, digging one hand into the sheets to get at least a bit of support. Meanwhile the other wandered down his torso to give himself the friction he was craving so desperately. 

But before he reached his aim, strong fingers - the ones not buried deep between his thigs - wrapped around his wrist, interrupting his motion. “Not yet. Patience, sweetheart.” Remus wanted to protest, to disregard the order, but there was a sort of determination in his voice, a silent promise forcing him to surrender. 

Instead of wrapping his hand around his demanding cock, like he wanted to, he instead covered his eyes with his arm and focused on the pleasant sensations those swift fingers were bringing him. He did not need to ask Sirius with words to add another finger. His body was doing it for him, all arched back and spread legs and clenching muscle. And when he got it, his eyes rolled back, his hand gripped tighter around the silky sheets. He lost sense of time then and there. Whether it had been seconds ore hours of Sirius satisfying him, the only thing he could focus on was the immense pleasure, slowly but steadily building in his abdomen and from there leaping to each and every cell in his body. 

He never consciously decided to move his hips, but somewhere along he started to push back against Sirius, practically fucking himself on his hand. He could not care about how desperate he must look anymore. And if he had, someone would’ve strongly disagreed. “God, you are stunning. I bet you could come like this.” The words needed a moment to get through all the arousal fogging his brain but when they did, he realized how close he already was. Again. 

He wasn’t even aware his body was able to do this, to come completely untouched. But now that he realized it, he was almost certain he would not need more than a few minutes just like this to reach the point of no return. Again. Well, that was a surprise. But it was not what he wanted. He was absolutely not ready for this experience to stop so soon. 

So, this time it was Remus wrapping his fingers around Sirius’ wrist to stop his motions. “I don’t want to. I want all of you.” Shit, his voice had already suffered badly. Sirius was meeting his eyes, locking his gaze as if he was searching for something. Whatever it was, he seemed to find it. He nodded and then slowly retreated his fingers. Remus couldn’t supress a whimper at the feeling of sudden emptiness. 

He lifted himself up a bit, supporting his weight on his elbows, to watch with hungry eyes how Sirius rolled the condom over and lubed himself up. He tried to ignore the little bit of nerves stirring in the back of his head at the prospect of what was awaiting him, tried to only focus on the want, screaming way more loudly. When their eyes met, he tried to slap on the most confident smirk he could muster up and crooked one finger in a come-hither gesture. He absolutely wanted to do this. He still was allowed to feel a little jittery, especially with someone entirely new. And especially with a person like Sirius who basically embodied all the things he never dared to dream of. 

The short flicker of nervousness was completely overshadowed when Sirius did his bidding and came closer again. Remus welcomed him readily, let him make himself comfortable between his legs, drawing up his knees a bit more to make it easier. He immediately let his hands wander over every bit of Sirius’ skin he could reach, his arms, shoulders, back, pulling him as close as possible. When he finally felt the blunt head of Sirius cock nudge him, he exhaled breathily. 

Their eyes met one more time, the final confirmation that this was okay. Then Sirius started pushing forward slowly. For the first few seconds there was nothing but pure adrenaline, lighting up all his nerve endings. But then the pain started to set in and with it came the tension, making it quickly impossible to proceed. Despite all the cautiousness from Sirius’ side it was still too much and after only a few moments Remus had to grab his shoulders, maybe a bit too vehemently, signalling him to stop. Which he of course instantly did. 

“Are you okay?” Sirius voice was gravelly, clearly showing that he was as affected by this as Remus was. “I just…need a second” he couldn’t suppress the hissing sound escaping him, proof of his distress. “We don’t have to do this, Remus” the soft reassurance was calming. It did not take away the stinging pain completely, obviously, but it soothed his nerves. “We can do anything else. Or nothing at all. I just don’t want you to force yourself to something you don’t enjoy.” Remus leant a tiny bit forward, so he could make their foreheads touch. 

“Thank you.” Hadn’t they been so close, Sirius would have most likely had problems to even understand him. But they were close, in any imaginable way. “But I do want to. So, so much. I at least want to try.” After all this yearning, he did not accept giving up just like this. 

Remus felt Sirius’ nod more than he saw it. Next thing, his fingers were softly cupping his face. “All right. Just breathe, sweetheart. Try to relax. You alone call the shots.” Surprisingly, it was not that hard to let the stinging pain fade into the background when there were those gentle words curling into his auditory canal, soft fingertips caressing his jawline and cheekbones. He tried to focus on the pleasant things. On every point their bodies touched each other, except the most obvious one. 

His knees pressed firmly into Sirius’ sides. His hands on his shoulders, slowly wandering to his neck, rubbing gentle circles into his skin, grazing his hairline. Their foreheads still pressed against each other, Sirius’ hands on his face, his chest and stomach covering his. It helped distracting him, concentrating on how great the touch of Sirius’ skin made him feel. The longer they stayed like this the more he got accustomed to the tugging feeling in his lower body. The pain did not completely disappear, but it slowly became less present, overshaded by a pleasant burning stretch. 

Sirius held completely still apart from peppering featherlight kisses over his jawline and the faint stubble on his chin and after a while of just indulging in it, Remus dared to move, slowly slinging his legs around Sirius hips and steadily starting to push him in further. It still stung, evident in the way he needed to dig his fingers deeper into the skin where they were curled around the other’s neck. But it was manageable now, compared to before, especially since he was assured, he was completely in control and could stop anytime it became too much to handle. He didn’t stop until the other’s hips were flush against him, eliciting a heavy moan out of both of them, nearly in unison.

Sirius made an effort not to stir, but his breathing became more laboured the further Remus pushed him into his body. It was satisfying to know that his partner was enjoying what they were doing as much as he was. He had never viewed sex as just himself getting off, it was always as much about pleasing the other person, making them feel good, finding out what they liked. The good, albeit slightly embarrassing part was, Sirius had no inhibitions telling him exactly how it was for him. 

“God, you are beautiful baby. You are doing so good, taking me so well. You feel so good.” Whispered tenderly in his ear, accompanied by the gentlest kisses to his face. Remus was surprised by the intense reaction his body provided. The blush creeping up his cheeks, the shiver taking hold of his entire body. Had he suddenly developed a praise kink he wasn’t aware of himself? “Tu es magnifique.” Oh great, apparently his newly discovered praise kink was amplified by the use of French. 

He almost lunged forward, catching Sirius’ lips in a searing, sloppy kiss. Partly because he needed him to shut up, partly because he couldn’t endure another second without this sinful mouth on his. While revelling in Sirius’ infatuating taste, he gingerly tried moving his hips just the tiniest bit, legs still wrapped tightly around the other’s hips, the loud moan escaping him disappearing behind his lips. 

He prolonged the kiss as long as possible until he had to come up for air. Not retreating even a millimetre, his lips brushed over Sirius’. “You can try moving. But slow.” The first slide back was minimal, and nonetheless it set every cell in his body on fire. He was burning up. Fast.   
Sirius’ movements were delicate at first, but Remus appreciated it, as he could easily guide his movements, show him how he liked it. And Sirius was excellent at picking up on his directions, complying with his every wish before he could even clearly phrase them for himself. 

The delicious slide of Sirius’ thick cock in and out of him was exhilarating, always on the brink of getting too much but never tipping over that edge. The slightly tugging pain had not disappeared miraculously, but it was getting lesser by the second, completely overpowered by feelings of pleasure. The desire for more, harder, deeper. 

The slow strokes were perfect at first, but soon it wasn’t quite enough anymore. He let one hand slide down from where it rested in the back of Sirius neck, digging desperate fingers into the firm swell of his ass to urge him on. The other glid over his back, trying to anchor himself somewhere. It was steadily getting more difficult to not lose himself entirely in lust. At the outskirts of his brain he faintly hoped, hotel rooms like this were properly soundproofed, but he couldn’t get himself to care enough. Neither did Sirius. 

Remus was rapidly getting closer to wanting release, but somehow, Sirius always seemed to know when the edge was too near, pulling him back. On one hand, he was thankful, because he didn’t want it to end yet, on the other it was frustrating, and he was getting desperate. “Can I finally touch myself now?” He didn’t even know why he asked. He didn’t have to, he could just do it, obviously he had full agency over his body. 

“No.” The smirk on Sirius’ face was irresistible but in contrast the unsatisfactory utterance made Remus groan. But instead of the expected ongoing torture he slid one hand between their bodies, unceremoniously grasping Remus’ fiercely neglected cock, expert fingers massaging the hard, twitching length, thumbing the swollen head. 

It was too much too fast. Gone was the attempt at gracefulness and dignity, the only thing left to do was rutting against that spectacular body above him, the fingers wrapping his erection, the cock inside his ass. Remus couldn’t care less about grace right now. He had to close his eyes due to the sensory overload. Seconds later he felt Sirius fingers stroke the few curls sticking to his forehead out of his face, could sense him coming closer to his ear. “Tu es incroayble.” 

Remus was completely gone. He wanted to warn Sirius how close he was but had apparently lost his ability to form coherent sentences somewhere along the way. The only words left in his vocabulary were “oh” and “mmmmmh” which technically weren’t even proper words. And then, just a few more hard tugs, perfectly in sync with deep thrusts into the exactly right spot, later, it was over. 

His orgasm washed over him like a tidal wave, annihilating all his senses for a moment. He did not consciously recognize the loud moan escaping his throat, nor how his legs started shaking, his toes curling, his hands digging harshly into Sirius’ back and the mattress, respectively. Not even his cock spilling copiously over Sirius hand and both their stomachs. It was just absolute bliss. 

He reentered his body right on time to feel Sirius pulse deep inside of him, causing a new wave of pleasure shooting through his limbs. Sirius face buried into the crook of his neck, his weight resting on top of him, Remus was content. For an amount of time he couldn’t pin down, they just stayed like that, hazily appreciating all the different reactions of his body, all the places they were still connected, until it was slowly getting uncomfortable. 

“Can you move please? It’s getting a bit much.” It was just a whisper but compared to the sound of heavy breaths filling the room seconds earlier, it was almost too loud. “Yes. Yes, of course, sorry.” Sirius’ voice had lost some of its smoothness, was a bit rougher now. Remus thought he could get addicted to the sound. 

Pulling out sent another surge of aftershock through Remus’ body, made him whimper ungracefully. For a moment Sirius’ body disappeared from his side, probably to dispose of the used condom. When he laid back down, he had brought paper towels with him and began to wipe away the mess Remus made, as well as the residue of lube between his legs, making the younger man giggle. He really had no control over the sounds his body produced anymore but he didn’t really care. 

After finishing his little cleaning intermission, Sirius laid down next to him again, facing him sideways, so Remus turned and did the same. For a few breaths they just looked at each other, grinning like idiots. Sirius wiggled his perfectly arched eyebrows suggestively and Remus just laughed in response, clueless what to say. Instead of talking he leaned forward, meeting Sirius in a kiss. 

It was tender, careful, not comparable to the way they kissed earlier. This was probably weird. They were obviously finished, so it was time to get dressed and make his farewells. But he didn’t want to. Not just yet. His body craved more of Sirius closeness, the contact of his skin. And the way the other closed his arms around him, pulled him tighter into the embrace, created the impression that he wasn’t alone in his desire. So he let himself indulge in it for just a little longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you SO much for reading. As always, comments make me very happy ;) 
> 
> *****
> 
> French Translations:   
> Chéri - Darling   
> Pardonne-moi, s’il te plaît. – Forgive me, please.  
> Comment puis-je me rattraper? – How can I make up for it?   
> Tu es magnifique. – You are wonderful.   
> Tu es incroyable. – You are incredible.


End file.
